Death is the only way out

Death is the only way out

Death is the only way out

She really said that and I knew what happened to her former husband.

Nina:  You answer me right now, dear! Do you think I am the one for you?10:07 PM 

Me: Lol, I didn’t know that you’re a hobby dominatrix, so demanding. 10:09 PM 

Me: Are you wearing leather? ? 10:09 PM 

Nina:  Answer me! And no I’m not wearing anything right now ? 10:10 PM 

Nina:  I already know the answer… because your avoiding… afraid of rejection. But you were persistent in the beginning (January up until now) I’m not sure why you were so persistent. I hope it wasn’t feeling sorry for me ?. But either way, you’re stuck with me…. because if I commit death is the only way out… lol 10:12 PM 

Me: I think about you the whole time and I’m not afraid of admitting it. Either you want to be with me or not 10:13 PM 

Nina:  I do want too… 10:17 PM 

Me: Well then don’t talk about other “options”, turn off 10:18 PM 

Nina:  You brought that up. I just asked a question… so there! 10:19 PM 

Me: You mentioned it earlier (options) but anyways,I’m looking forward to see you tomorrow and I’m sure you want to feel those hands again?! 10:21 PM 

Nina:  I did not. I said there are men at Home Depot… which is a fact. I look forward to seeing you as well… I hope that when we learn to grow together you know 10:24 PM 

Nina:  I can’t be “changed” so whatever you don’t like should be addressed now… 10:24 PM 

Me: As long as you don’t cheat I’m sure we can handle and discuss everything like adults should do 10:26 PM 

Nina:  Lol. No cheating. That’s fair 10:28 PM 

Me: For everything else there’s a good spanking 10:29 PM 

Nina:  I watched my mom destroy my dad growing up with cheating on him. I use to get physically abused for telling on her… everyone else kept it a secret 10:31 PM 

Nina:  I think that’s why my step dad and I are so close till this day… him and my sister practically have no relationship and that’s his bio daughter… I can’t stand adultery with a passion. Makes me sick to my stomach… 10:32 PM 

Nina:  So your safe… …. no spankings… unless I get to do you too… 10:33 PM 

Nina:  Maybe we should define cheating ? What’s your definition? 10:33 PM 

Me: Everything you do with a other man behind your man’s back 10:39 PM 

Me: Even sexually texting, kissing (well, just saying) 10:39 PM 

Me: Do you want to spank me? Just curious, be honest 10:40 PM 

Nina:  No, haven’t crossed my mind at all. Lol 10:41 PM 

Nina:  I have been told that I am extremely flirtatious… ?. I dont know if   that’s true or not… it comes natural I guess.. 10:43 PM 

Me: Well that can be very disrespectful if your bf or husband is standing next to you but it also depends on how you do it. While I wouldn’t be jealous I still would consider it disrespectful 10:49 PM 

Nina:  Welp… there goes that… lol because i can’t catch it… 10:50 PM 

Nina:  Today in Home Depot this guy once helped me with flooring he loaded it in my truck. Today he was there again… he helped with peg boards and hooks… I spoke briefly but I went to the cash register… and he followed me out he said “why do you look at me like that? You did that the last time too. I said did what 10:52 PM 

Nina:  He said your look drives me insane and gives me butterflies in my stomach… (SMH)…. but I didn’t do anything. Honestly. 10:52 PM 

Nina:  I dont know. I guess if you catch it you can let me know. But it happens. Even my homegirls say so… 10:53 PM 

Nina:  Anyways…… 10:54 PM 

Me: I believe you, without you telling me I wouldn’t even know. You’re very pretty and sexy and assuming no other men would look at you is delusional 10:54 PM 

Nina:  When we talked the other day (reflecting) you said your last dates were black girls and a German… are you Infatuated with black girls? Do you think or categorize us as freaks? I’m curious if your wives were black and please me miss me with that BS I see no color… let’s just be real. 10:56 PM 

Nina:  Have you ever slept with a black girl would be my next question if you answered to your wives not being black. 10:56 PM 

Me: No no and no 10:57 PM 

Me: Why freaks? 10:57 PM 

Nina:  My stalker friend who wants to be with me never been with a black girl… I guess he lucked out with me and I became his addiction… smh. I don’t want that all over again…. 10:57 PM 

Me: I told you the way I grew up there was no talk about race 10:57 PM 

Nina:  Ahhh I see 10:58 PM 

Me: I became more aware of it when watching American movies 10:58 PM 

Me: Please don’t start talking about race 10:58 PM 

Me: At least not regarding me 10:59 PM 

Nina:  I’m not talking about race… 10:59 PM 

Me: I don’t care but I care about you 10:59 PM 

Me: What if I’m transgender with no d…. ? 10:59 PM 

Me: Would you still want to be with me????? 11:00 PM 

Nina:  Lol. That’s cool… I have toys. 11:00 PM 

Nina:  What if I’m thinking of giving myself to Jesus and becoming a reborn nun and committed to never having sex again? 11:01 PM 

Me: As a nun you can’t be in a relationship with me 11:03 PM 

Me: So that alone would cease it 11:04 PM 

Nina:  Ohhh nuns can’t date ? 11:04 PM 

Me: We’ll be fine, no worries, you said you already checked me out,lol 11:04 PM 

Nina:  That I did! 11:05 PM 

Nina:  Always do… 11:05 PM 

Me: I should have checked you out but I’m too nice 11:05 PM 

Nina:  Pretty busy tonight? You totally touched my butt… lol 11:06 PM 

Me: Lol, yes I did 11:06 PM 

Me: I have to go back into the dead zone, that’s fr sure 11:07 PM 

Me: For 11:07 PM 

Nina:  Right now ? 11:07 PM 

Me: When I’m called 11:09 PM 

Me: You should try to wear something low cut and something tight ? 11:10 PM 

Nina:  Should I now? 11:10 PM 

Me: No when you see me 11:10 PM 

Nina:  Oh, just only when I see you? Not just day to day ? 11:11 PM 

Me: If that’s what you want, sure 11:12 PM 

Nina:  Lol… then I would probably gain a stalker a day… lol 11:12 PM 

Nina:  We don’t want that. So I keep it simple. Sweat pants and t shirts lol 11:13 PM 

Me: Ok 11:13 PM 

Me: TTYL, I miss you, g2g, sorry 11:14 PM 

Nina:  I? 11:14 PM 

Nina:  I’ll just text what I’m thinking and you’ll answer later… bye babe 11:14 PM 

Nina:  Just got into bed. Thinking of you. Miss talking to you. 12:02 AM 

Nina:  And I’m just starting to fall asleep. Goodnight Mr. Perfect 1:51 AM 

Nina:  MMS Received (she sent me a picture of a very messy teens room) 2:17 AM 

Nina:  This is the shit I deal with with that fucking child Trying to sneak out my home at 230 3:26 AM 

Me: Good morning 11:47 AM 

Me: I hope you didn’t miss me too much, I don’t want you to be sad, I want you to be happy 11:48 AM 

Nina:  Hey! 11:48 AM 

Me: how are you? still wanna see me tonight? ? 11:51 AM 

Me: a hey is all I can get? ? 12:02 PM 

Nina:  I did miss you. Again no goodnight from you ?. And yes, I would still  try to see you tonight, I will fuck you and you won’t be able to resist. And no a hey isn’t All you get. I was just busy showing the kids what needs to be done. Since everyone wants to drag ass this morning 12:10 PM 

Me: oh ok 12:15 PM 

Nina:  I hate when you say oh ok… lol my kids say that is that is not a proper response… 12:17 PM 

Me: hate is a strong word but I’ll try to find something else like I see or too bad or shit happens or I feel with you or awwwww 12:20 PM 

Me: I guess I’ll take a nap then, I cleaned the bedroom and bathroom and did laundry, you’re busy so I’ll ttyl ☺ 12:56 PM 

Me: I miss talking to you 1:31 PM 

Me: ok, I’m up and you still haven’t answered, I hope that doesn’t mean chaos at (your) home 2:09 PM 

Nina:  That was a nap! Short nap babe 2:10 PM 

Me: I know, everything ok at home? what’s keeping you so busy? 2:11 PM 

Nina:  Yard work, and pool cleaning, steam cleaning couches 2:19 PM 

Me: i’m getting ready for work 3:22 PM 

Nina:  Did you eat baby? 3:39 PM 

Me: Yeah though didn’t make me lunch or breakfast, lol 3:40 PM 

Me: though you…. 3:41 PM 

Nina:  Because you didn’t ask. A close mouth never gets fed 3:42 PM 

Me: I’d like to have breakfast tomorrow ☺ 3:44 PM 

Me: I can come and pick it up ???? 3:44 PM 

Me: today it’s frustrating to communicate with you, are you in the panic room? lol 4:04 PM 

Nina:  Lol. No babe I’m not in the panic room. My friend is over 4:22 PM 

Me: ok, text me when you have time then. 4:25 PM 

Nina:  It sucks when you can’t reach me like you want huh. That’s how I feel. 4:36 PM 

Nina:  I get so angry ? 4:36 PM 

Nina:  Because I feel like I need access to my man 24/7 4:37 PM 

Me: I hear you but you shouldn’t do it on purpose because I’m not doing it on purpose. If all goes well I think I should work remote, this way I have a decent income that would pay for a lot of things and then we can see if we’d do a business or whatever we can agree on 4:39 PM 

Nina:  I’m not doing it on purpose. That would be rude… lol 4:45 PM 

Me: I know right. So what are your thoughts (about my previous text)? 4:47 PM 

Nina:  What do you mean my thoughts about it 4:58 PM 

Nina:  About going into a business about me working remote and then maybe do something else on top of that 5:00 PM 

Nina:  I’m not sure what remote means? (From home?) and I don’t want you to stop everything you have for me or because of me. I think all that will come with time and being that we are the ones for eachother. 5:01 PM 

Me: that sounds like back paddling but I told you that I had been thinking about that before we met 5:03 PM 

Nina:  How does that sound like backpedaling 5:04 PM 

Me: just something I read when people say don’t do this because or for me that usually means they don’t have any serious or long term interest. I actually disagree, I shouldn’t read so much, lol. 5:06 PM 

Me: but don’t you want me to have different hours? 5:06 PM 

Me: 24/7 access, like you said? 5:07 PM 

Nina:  Give me a Minute to Respond because my texts are going to come back to you jumbled up 5:08 PM 

Nina:  It’s simple. I was just discussing this with my ultimate best friend (51 yrs old) I said “I fell in love with a man I barely know. I actually seriously fell in 5:16 PM 

Nina:  love. Just tripped and landed into it. But I do have my what if’s you because I’m not done with life yet. I am just learning independence again. I live on my 5:16 PM 

Nina:  own and pay my own bills… I do what I want and when I want it. So my what’s if are there when it comes to you… 5:16 PM 

Nina:  We barely know eachother. Don’t respond until I say done 5:17 PM 

Nina:  Did you know I am a disabled vet? 100? And do you know why? I suffer from horrible migraine and adjustment disorder…(whatever that means) I could possibly be 5:19 PM 

Nina:  bipolar… or I learned so much about it that I live vicariously through this disorder… I could even at times have an adjustment disorder. 5:19 PM 

Nina:  Are you ready to step into a world of no kids to 6? Because I do have six and would give them the world if I could. I’m all they will have. There is a two year 5:20 PM 

Nina:  old girl who lost her father in December and I’m not ready to have men “play in her life” she has to know a father, she called everyone dad… are you ready to 5:21 PM 

Nina:  give that to her for life… and beyond if we don’t make it? Because I don’t want to put a temporary in her life…. 5:21 PM 

Nina:  Where is the bottom line? Where is the middle? Where do we meet? Do you move in? Do I move out do we buy together how does all that work. Because when I say the 5:22 PM 

Nina:  next man is my forever (you-hopefully) I mean that without even blinking an eye. I do want you to have different hours, I do want your support and love for 5:22 PM 

Nina:  the kids and I, But I don’t wanna build off a fairy tale because we barely know eachother 5:22 PM 

Me: done? 5:25 PM 

Nina:  My next big purchase is an RV… I want to travel, I want my kids to stop living in this damn house 24/7 can we agree on things line this? 5:25 PM 

Nina:  Or is this waisted money. I don’t want you to give up what you have   going on in your life. Where could I possibly give you a movie production center in this home (because I walked this home- trying to add on based off what you need) so I do think about you more then you know. I say we need a movie room, a panic room (lol) a babies room… 5:26 PM 

Nina:  and an office for you… lol… we need a 15,000 sq ft home lol… I 5:26 PM 

Nina:  say these things aloud because I feel like your my forever… but I 5:26 PM 

Nina:  also feel like it’s a fairytale waiting to go nightmare if these 5:26 PM 

Nina:  things aren’t thought with to great care. I am done ? 5:26 PM 

Nina:  Yes I said don’t respond till I say done 5:26 PM 

Nina:  Give your phone a minute to catch up…. I’m gonna get you a new damn phone. Lol 5:27 PM 

Delusions of grandeur?

Sometimes Nina was saying a lot of weird things.

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